TEACH YOUR CHILDREN TO FEAR THEIR GOD

Proverbs 1:7 says, “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge.” Proverbs 9:10 repeats the theme: “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.” Again we see that all genuine wisdom starts with fearing God. The fear of God is the one true foundation of the wisdom we must teach our kids.

By now this is already a familiar point. We’ve visited it repeatedly throughout the opening chapters of this book. It was in a sense the whole theme of chapters two and three. It may begin to sound redundant, but Scripture itself repeatedly stresses this point. Parents who miss the point have no excuse. Successful parenting literally begins with instilling in your children a proper fear of God.

I mentioned briefly in chapter three that this is not a cowardly, craven fear. It’s not a phobia. It’s not the sort of fear that regards God as malevolent. There’s no trace of abhorrence or enmity in true godly fear.

This fear has two aspects. The first is reverence. It is a sacred awe of God’s utter holiness. It involves the kind of respect and veneration that results in fear in the presence of such absolute majesty.

The second aspect is fear of God’s displeasure. Genuine faith acknowledges God’s right to chasten, His right to punish, and His right to judge. Therefore, in the presence of God, true wisdom trembles with a holy, healthy sense of terror and apprehension. Fear is the right word for it. The deeper our sense of our own guilt, the more profound should be our dread of God’s displeasure.

When you teach your children about God, be sure to give them a full appreciation of all His attributes. Children need to know, even from the earliest age, that God is angry with the wicked, and He will punish evildoers (Psalm 7:11–13). Material designed for young children too often presents only the gentle, meek, and mild attributes of God. He is portrayed as an always-benign grand- fatherly being—an insipid, man-made god, more like Santa than the God of Scripture. This is a very serious mistake, and I believe it accounts for the careless attitude so many in our society have toward God. They mistakenly assume that whatever God’s nature, He will ultimately be harmless and kindly, even toward those who have disobeyed Him. That is the impression many children take away from the typical Sunday school lesson. But it is not the God of Scripture. Take care not to teach your children such a wrong perspective of God.
There is a true sense in which you must teach your children to fear God, and especially to fear His displeasure. You have not satisfied the responsibilities of parenthood when you have made your child submit to you. If you are consistent and firm in your discipline, your child may obey you because he or she fears violating your standards. That is a fairly easy thing to achieve. But it is not the proper goal of biblical parenting. Your child should fear violating God’s standard, not merely yours. You are only an intermediary with the responsibility of teaching your child to fear God. If your children grow up fearing only your displeasure but not God’s, what will they do when you are not there?

Your children need to grow up with an awareness that when they do wrong, it doesn’t just irritate Mommy; it doesn’t just antagonize Daddy; it doesn’t just cause disorder in the family. But when they disobey, they set themselves against a holy God who deals out consequences for those who violate His righteous principles.

My goal as a father was not merely to have my children fear being chastened by their father. I wanted them to fear being chastened by their God. I wanted them to fear my discipline, too, of course, but that was incidental. I knew I could not always be around to hold them accountable, but God is. And the consequences of violating His will are infinitely greater than any disobedience on the human level. Unfortunately, few kids today grow up with that awareness. Kids are no longer taught to fear God, and it shows, at every level of society.

From the very earliest age, teach your children that sin is a capital offense against a holy God. Teach them that God is not mocked, and they will reap the bitter consequences of whatever sin they sow. Instill in them a healthy fear of God. Without that sort of fear, genuine repentance is not even possible.

Furthermore, when your children fear God, they will also fear sin. That’s certainly a healthy fear to cultivate. It will spare them much grief in life by keeping them from evil (16:6).

It may also literally prolong their lives. Proverbs 10:27 says, “The fear of the LORD prolongs days, but the years of the wicked will be shortened.” Want to give your son or daughter a rich, full life? Teach them the fear of the Lord. “The fear of the LORD is a fountain of life, to turn one away from the snares of death” (14:27). “The fear of the LORD leads to life, and he who has it will abide in satisfaction; he will not be visited with evil” (19:23).

Fearing the Lord is more profitable than wealth. “Better is a little with the fear of the LORD, than great treasure with trouble” (15:16).

“In the fear of the LORD there is strong confidence, and His children will have a place of refuge” (14:26).


MacArthur, J. (1998). Successful Christian parenting : raising your child with care, compassion, and common sense (pp. 78–81). Word Pub.